Press "Enter" to skip to content

Preventative maintenance

The eagle screamed so back to writing Two Cent Worth if you savvy.
We always used that term aboard ship in the Coast Guard come pay day. All the mates lined up with the highest ranking first in line. Everybody was paid in cash as others waited in line to collect on their gambling debts. Not me because I was always too tight to play cards or shoot dice with the mates.

Had this one First Class Boson Mate that always wanted to borrow a few bucks but he was very hard to collect from plus he didn’t want to pay anything to boot. Only he taught me a lesson the first go round because after that I wouldn’t loan him a nickel.
What’s that old saying, shame on you first time but shame on me second time?
There were some guys that would pay out their entire pay check after a 30 day pay period to pay their gambling debt.
Some of the nicer guys would let them keep ten bucks or so to buy deodorant, soap and toothpaste. Smokes were a buck a carton back then and free of all taxes.
Many miles have been traveled since that time, be it nautical, air or flying low in a vehicle. Having past the golden age plus another ten years the old gold (not a cigarette) has started to rust. WD-40 is not doing the job.
Being a believer in preventive maintenance, and after putting it off for ten years, this ole mate finally had his colon checked.
Although there is a permanent frown on my face from building up to it, the procedure was not all that bad compared a few bottles of barium consumed prior to being x-rayed a few years back.
Had to drink a full gallon of this nasty stuff that is suppose to clean you out. I guarantee it!
This being done in a hospital with you being knocked out makes all the difference in the world and again the worse part is the quantity of the cocktail to give you a case of the turkey trots.
Then they take you to the recovery area which should be renamed to the gas chamber area as the air is expelled from the photographed procedure.
Didn’t win a checkered flag or anything but sure was glad to get home and eat a bite or two. Jell-O and broth don’t do much for a shy fat boy.
My phobia is gone now since the procedure is done. My second dad, father-in-law passed by what started out as colon cancer. He was in his 70’s and a fit man indeed.
He told me after all said and done, “Charlie, if I had it to do all over again, I’d let it kill me.”
Come on Old Man Winter, get on down the road, I got a garden to till and onions ready to go in the ground.
Behave!