Press "Enter" to skip to content

Opposites attract

Me and the Mrs. are about as different as night and day. It is said that opposites attract as we been stuck together like magnets for might near 36 years. Reckon what I’m getting at is; she’s educated while I ain’t.

She went all the way through high school and on to college ultimately got a college education and some couth while I was lucky to get through the ninth grade. Our conversations are probably different than most households, here’s an example:

We got on the subject of last week’s newspaper article of the Raphael painting making its tour of the United States. The subject painting is entitled “LaFornarina” (c. 1520) by Raphael Sanzuio (1483-1520). The painting ain’t nothing more than a naked woman from the belly button up and is said to have fascinated scholars for centuries. I told the Mrs. that the reason they were fascinated was because they probably couldn’t believe a woman would pose for something like that back in those days.

I said to her, how this can be called art and what Janet Jackson did at last year’s Super Bowl was indecent and vulgar. At least Ms Jackson’s was so fast, I didn’t get to see what happened. Art to me are the bronze Mustang Horses at Los Colinas near Dallas, a pretty woven Indian blanket or a colorful jar of pepper sauce. The Mrs. simply shakes her head as she reads the big city paper.

Ain’t suppose to talk about politics none but what would you do to help social security?

Deep foreign aid cuts would be tops on my list followed by requiring members of Congress to start paying their fair share of social security taxes not to mention severe pay cuts in their retirement packages. What is that old saying, “What’s good for the goose is good for the gander?”

Or just get down on all the fraud, especially in the Medicare system.

Surely there are numerous other cuts that could be made to salvage the current system rather than have the funds placed in something like the stock market. That’s about as dumb a decision as windshield wipers on a goat’s butt. Enough politics, somebody will be saying unkind words if I continue on the subject.

Personally, I think one of the greatest things about marriage is that as both husband and father, I can say anything I want to around the house. Of course, no one pays the least bit of attention.

I know what men want. Men want to be really, really close to someone who will leave them alone.

******

Long ago when men cursed and beat the ground with sticks, it was called witchcraft. Today, it is called Golf.

Why don’t sheep shrink when it rains?

Why did kamikaze pilots wear helmets?